Feeling worry and stress is common and normal when adolescents and teens go back to school. It’s natural for teens to feel some amount of back-to-school anxiety, even if they’re excited to return. If the worry and fear doesn’t subside after the first week, and if it starts to hinder attendance, school performance, and/ or social ability, it may be a time to seek the help of a therapist.

Anxiety disorders in kids and teens are common. Parents need to know how to recognize the difference between an anxiety disorder and common levels of worry in school (low levels of stress and anxiety that don’t hinder functioning). Having anxiety is more than simply worrying too much. Anxiety disorders are excessive fears and distress that are out of proportion to the situation, and impair a child or teen’s ability to function normally. Anxiety diagnoses include Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), social anxiety, separation anxiety, acute anxiety (such as panic attacks), and more.

Parents and educators can help kids and teens manage low levels of stress and anxiety

There are many breathing exercises that help regulate the nervous system and keep kids and teens grounded. These need to be implemented on a regular basis and may not be effective if a panic attack is beginning. These need to be used once you notice your heart rate increasing and still have the ability to control your body:

Deep Breathing to create calm:

Take a slow, deep breath in through your nose. Imagine you are smelling a fragrant flower, and it take you 4 seconds to take the smell in.

Then, take a slow, steady breath out with open, pursed lips. Imagine you are blowing out 30 birthday candles, or blowing a dandelion, trying to get all the seeds.

When you breathe out, feel your lungs deflate and your belly push out. EMPTY YOUR BREATH. This is the important piece that will engage the parasympathetic system which is relaxation. You have the power to relax your system. Feel the breath move down your arms, legs, feet, and through the floor. Repeat this 6-8 times.

Panic Breathing:

If you find yourself panicking, and breathing heavy with an increased heart-rate, this exercise can be helpful.

Close your eyes or focus on something to hold a gaze. Start counting your breath, breathing IN 1 and OUT 1. On the out-breath push it through your belly. Do this 5xs to create a rhythm. Then try IN 2 and OUT 2 and do this 3 times. Then IN 3 and OUT 3 and do this 3 times. Then IN 4 and OUT 4 and do this 4 times. Increasing all the way to 6 counts IN and 6 OUT, 6 times.

Using Somatics:

When someone is stuck in a fear response, it can be helpful to shift the nervous system by using the body. Get up and walk to the bathroom. Take a drink of water. Eat a snack. Put some cold water on your face. Go to the nurse and ask for some time to regulate. These little movements can unlock a panic response and then allow for deep breathing to calm the nervous system.

Distraction:

Ask any teen what helps with anxiety and you will be met with  – my phone and air pods. Maybe that is what they need for a little bit. To take a time out and listen to music, or listen to a meditation from apps such as Calm, and Headspace.

Finding a safety zone:

This is about finding a safe target for your child/ teen to focus on each class. It could be a friend or teacher, or interest in a subject. Simply focusing on something positive to hold on to. Parents can speak with the teacher to create a shared understanding of how to enhance the experience. Maybe its a smile or a ‘Hello’ from the teacher that can make a big difference.

Transition object:

Fidget spinners were all the rage until they weren’t. The concept holds, though. Can you child/ teen bring something with them that feels like a safe object. That holds meaning and that they can use as a tactile object/ sensory object to focus on.

The nurses office!

We often encourage our teen clients to reach out to the counselor and nurse if they are starting to panic. The activity of leaving class, walking to the nurses office, drinking water, going to the bathroom, breathing, taking a time out and maybe watching/ listening to their phone – all of this can help a child/ teen avoid a panic attack, or help once it starts. And maybe after a 15 minute break they can resume their day.

Therapy:

Of course therapy will help teens manage stress and anxiety. Sometimes having a trusted adult who can normalize their experience and offer coping strategies can be enough to help teens feel in-control. Therapy offers the opportunity to learn emotional regulation skills and to process the difficulties they are facing at school or home.

Family Therapy:

Sometimes a teens anxiety is expressed in school but has nothing to do with school – meaning – it’s the home environment and what the family is struggling with that is overwhelming for kids/ teens. Family therapy can help the whole system move through challenging times from a thoughtful place.

Anyone can always reach out to us for a free consult to explore options. Give us a call at (732) 266-8994, email us at info@thrivecounselingnj.com or schedule a call from our contact page here.